Have you lost a deal this year because the founder chose to take someone else’s money.. over yours..
More than once? ..don’t worry I took 3 people who work at a16z off my email list the day that happened to me.. that’s how mad I was too.
Hey this is Josh James, I’m Founder, CEO of Rocket Acquisitions which is a portfolio of companies that manage the marketing for companies worth about 11 billion dollars.
So I’m mad. I’m furious. My face is still red and I’m fuming.
You can see the smoke poofing out of my ears like some sort of cho cho train.
I’m in the process of working 24/7 on solving this problem, so this never happens to me, my friends or my favorite experts (yourself included in those groups) again.
You know what that snaked deal actually meant.
Let me tell you a one word story that will fire you up too.
That meant war my friend.
What does that mean
No one I know- snakes anyone I know- and walks away without having declared war.
For the last 30 days I have relentlessly, sleeplessly, gone at this problem with so much leverage and skill that it is scary.
This will never happen again to me or you ever again, and by the time I’m finished a16z will be a backend coffee shop for content creators looking to siphon off short term backlinks.
The worst part my friend, is I’m not even morally in the wrong here.
What is morality anyways
Reality is.. that you and I both know these big boys put these founders into IPO ice boxes and push them into slave camps.
They are one term sheet and 1 clause away from locking these founding teams in single bathroom 1500 sq ft apartments and packing them with 6 bunk beds, buried somewhere in the depths of SOHO, and that’s the last you and I will ever hear from them again until they exit in 2028.
I would not put it past them if their fund management teams own those apartments and are taking a little extra on the back end of some of those incubators… I won’t name names… Y-COMBINATOR!!
They trap founders in vices and work them to the brink of death for what? a standardized salary? a guarantee that they will burn their way to a desperate series A? -where they just saw off 10% of their left arm anyway.
Is raw systems software labor worth 100 million on the backend of that billion dollar exit they keep promising..
Speaking of slice and dicing, have you seen these post money cap tables, you, nor I, will even get in again once they sign their company souls with the devil. The devil, that’s right I said it. I told you I’m super mad right now.
Selling their souls, come on Josh you must be over reacting..
If I see one more email asking me for a “free” 2 minute marketing conversation from anyone who has a brother whose last name starts with W and whose bank account has over 9 digits.. then I am 100% done with crypto buffs.
And I am for sure not ever talking to anyone else in crypto or anyone in the investing world who has more money than me again.
I swear I will quit marketing companies whose revenues are over 100 million and I will set a “W” filter that auto archives on my inbox, I swear to god.
I know you were mad too when it happened, this is our first chance to take them out. And never lose a deal again.
God Mode Deal Flow Enabled
Let’s go baby!
I call this God Mode Deal Flow, And the best part InsertNameHere I can get you in.. today.
Quick This is THE Game Changer. This is THE Konami Code. The game shark. The Mew under the truck in Pokemon red/blue.
I’m flipping the entire world on its back like a turtle, while I’m making this happen for us, due to my skill and network advantage here.
Silicon Valley needs time to rethink why they love computers again.
And why do they have founding teams paying Y-Combinator to fill up these destitute apartment complexes and grind out marketing apps that literally do nothing but build websites? People are paying them.. PAYING THEM!
To what? Grind out new marketing software categories..
You, me, and 97 other people who have just as much clout can out class these valley boys and their software models right now. Today.
This exact afternoon. After 30 days in the tank. I solved it.
Want to know how? How can I get your money as hot as magma so that a16z looks like they borrowed theirs from an incomplete star wars monopoly set?
Ok don’t actually wait on this, I could go broke on just the leverage and sweet sweet satisfaction of sniping everything under the sun that’s available in GameFi, NFTs and Crypto from the VC world right now.